Thursday, August 04, 2011

I Will Survive

I still feel you
Next to me
Against me
Inside me
Arms encircling
I still hear you
Whispering to me
Telling me your thoughts
Your dreams
That you love me
Etched into my mind
Into my soul
That will exist
Through all time
Of love
And loss
Of finding what was meant to be
And not being able to keep it
That even dreams
And hopes
Can't make the impossible
For more dignity
While dying
And more strength
As I am crushed
That love hurts
That laughter heals
That anger is a preventable disease
And that I will survive

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

In Answer to Those

In answer to those
who would ask why
I vent things here
that many would choose to keep to themselves
out of embarrassment
or shame
because to admit to them
is to be terminally flawed
when I let these things out
I say
I am not ashamed
of myself
and my imperfections
I remove the poison
that has been my marriage
my life
from my psyche
and the storm
that is my thoughts
quiets just a little bit more
and eventually
I can sleep

Purple Globulous Green

Purple globulous green
Fighting astride
The dragon
Of death
She laughs
And sings
Songs of delirium
As she struggles
Rich language
Poor facts
Timeless, ageless
With death
Fractal geometry
Numeric metaphore
No sense insense
Wisdom and magic
Accompany her
As she rages
Against the machine
Thrown out
The sun
And herself
Situation and approximations
Of help
And condolences
The purple unicorn


A couple of years ago
I saw a doctor
Or so he purported
About my insomnia
Or how I yawned in the dark
Fitfully tossing and turning
Then bleary-eyed in the day
Forced myself to stay awake
He suggested activities
That might quiet
The freight train
chugging in my skull
Things like reading
And knitting were mentioned
Lovely, peaceful, quiet activities
Unless, like me, you just so happen
To do both of those things
An odd mix, to be sure
As your jobs (not your day job)
But job, nonetheless.
When I pointed this out to him
He was at a loss for suggestions
Of ways to turn off my brain
so, insomnia, it is.