To Stretch Your Wings

To stretch your wings

and soar

is truly a gift

from God

and scary as all hell.

To dance alone

swaying in the kitchen

jitterbugging down the hall

twirling in the garden

is still to dance.

Lift up your voice

and sing

out LOUD

off-key is okay

so long as you sing.

Laughter

reaches in

takes the pain from my heart

chews it up and spits it out

and leaves my ribs aching.

The rhythms of love

choreograph

a sultry dance

undulating, gyrating

leaving you breathless.

Live, love, laugh

dance and sing

and soar

this is your only chance

are you gonna take it?

The Ice Cream Man (in poetry)

This post came about from a combination of things.  The first was my desire to try my hand at a form of poetry called gogyohka.  For many people the fact that this is a relatively free form without the stricter syllable requirement of haiku or senryu makes this easier to do.  For me, however, I find it harder.  Without the strict requirements my brain has too much wiggle room.  The second thing influencing this post is the novel "Closet Treats" or as I prefer to think of it "The Ice Cream Man" by my dear friend Paul Cooley.  

The first poem is simply for Paul.  The grouping of seven that follows is a poetic interpretation of his work.

‎​You've taught me

the beauty in horror

with your haunting

words.

Thank you.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Those loud loud bells

a cacophony

slithering down the street

enticing children

then entrapping them. 

Evil eyes

not quite hidden

acid yellow

swirling crimson

watching you.

Yummy treats

for children

and children

yummy treats

for fiends.

A child runs

terrified

from visions

and a fiend

combined. 

Black talons

slash

ripping innocence

and children

to shreds.

‎​

The loudest scream

is the one

ripped from a throat

never heard

only imagined.

Pain, suffering

strange evil lurking

hero only human

fighting valiantly

but no ending in sight.

Today's Lesson: Coping with Pain and Grief

Today's lesson folks:

When you hold it all in and

say you're fine, you're not. 

Mind, body, and soul

have infinite room for joy

not so pain and grief. 

As the hurt flows in

process it and let it go

no need to keep it. 

Joy is what to hold

each little bit that finds you

smiles, giggles, hold those. 

When indeed you hurt

and who among us hasn't

it's okay to cry. 

It's okay to need

a shoulder, an ear, a hug

let people help you. 

What's the point of friends

If you never lean on them

let them do their job. 

One day down the road

roles will be reversed and I

will be there for you.

FairNine

A little over two months ago one of my best friends (whose way with words makes me swoon) said I should check out this blog, this writer, this woman, this person.  He didn't say it in that many words but I knew he admired her on all fronts.  I found someone (with more literary talent than I could dream to have) who expresses so well, so many of my thoughts and desires.

When I read that first post I intended to go back through her archives.  As usual, I got sidetracked.  Today I saw her on twitter and was reminded of the reading I needed to do.  I went back to the beginning.  And was reminded of how connected to her I feel.  I started pulling out little bits of some of her posts that resonate so harmoniously with me.    After each excerpt I have included the link to the full post.  In addition to these little nuggets of wisdom there are entire posts that I just love.  These are listed at the end.  I wish I could repost them all here but that feels more like plagiarism than what? What's the word I want here? Adoration? Worship? Admiration?   I apologize for my gushing...hopefully, you will understand when you read her words.  Fair warning: much of this deals with sex and sexuality and is not suitable for work, minors, prudes, or those easily offended.

What I want in life can't be made from money. I can't stand the idea of spending my life working toward financial stability, and finding out in the end that I wasted my time. There better be a lot more to life than all of that "EXPECTED" nonsense, and I am not going to wait around to let it find me.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2008/08/manhunt.html

Since when does a clean house and non-interest in sex=good person?

I'm happier my way.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/03/subversive-no-i-am-indeed-not-perfect.html

 The only thing that ever sucks about performing oral on a woman is that it is incredibly frustrating to both breathe and encourage the oh-my-god-don't-ever-stop gyrations. Sometimes I wish I didn't need to breathe, just so we could get her there.

My belief is, if you can breathe, you're doing it wrong. 

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/11/doing-it-wrong.html

 A cold orgasm is akin to starvation. This ardor needs to meet its match, needs a mate. Give me someone who burns the way I burn. Give me someone that drowns in it as I do. I need that intensity. Anything less is just far too paltry. I am starving.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/11/because-only-people-for-me-are-mad-ones.html

I am a passionate person. Everything I love incites a fire in me, a burning. I am easily swept up. I look for that quality in others. 

Art will do it for me, photography and sculpture will too. Music, good writing, dance. Above all, seeing that fire burning in other people does it for me. I love the passion with which some people live. These fiery people are nearly always problematic. There is always something not quite right about them. All the fervency leaves them a little unbalanced. We all crash. This I love too.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/12/crash.html

I am a woman of many tastes. I love all kinds of love. I love the soft kind, the forbidden kind, the rough kind, the kinky kind. What I desire though, more than anything, is his love. 

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/12/ask-less.html

Writing, for me, is a potent expression of pleasure. Many things please me. Yes, sex pleases me. Yes,intimacy, love, affection, and joviality please me. Yes, literature, art, music, dance, individuality, free form expression, and writing please me. I immerse myself in my loves here. I recline on my literary couch and indulge in a little lotus-eating here. I am not ashamed.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/01/dare.html

I'm ready to move forward. Ready to create a life full of my own rules. 

Rule #1: There are no rules.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/02/epiphany.html

I am priming myself for a move most find questionable because I cannot abide by leaving such a gaping unknown. I still yearn for immersion in more creativity than I, myself, express. I'm touched by a lyric to a song I heard the other day, something about living a life out loud. Part of me thinks, "what does that even mean?" while part of me resonates with it. 

I dislike my way of leaving seemingly disconnected strands of thought as a blog. The strands to belong to a greater whole, I promise. I just have no way of braiding them for you.

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/04/beauty.html

The following links are to entire posts that I simply love:

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/11/remote.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2009/12/music.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/01/muse.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/01/abhor.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/01/unsated.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/01/reiteration.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/04/random.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/04/waking.html

http://fairnine.blogspot.com/2010/05/solution.html

I hope I have not embarrassed her too much.  I am not a stalker fan.  More a lazy fan.  But definitely a fan.  Elise, thank  you for sharing your talents, emotions, words, aspirations, joys, loves, hates, everything with us.

It Should Be Raining

Words, sounds, syllables,

phrases, thoughts, ideas, noise

jumbled in my head. 

Naked emotions

flow freely competing for

the breath to gain life. 

Finding new lessons

patience, compassion, faith, trust

hardest in my life. 

Learning watching him

He shows me such patient love

His love centers me. 

Trying to focus

on the truly important

not getting bogged down. 

Never my intent

hating that I have caused pain

you deserved better. 

Laughter, color, love

our children's faces happy

things I believe in. 

Time changes people

I wish we could undo it

doesn't work that way. 

Encouraging words

unconditional love, trust

the things he gives me 

I want to be proud

of myself, our kids, and you

how we handle this. 

I found the courage

to say I don't deserve this

we all deserve more. 

It looks sunny out

emotional disconnect

it should be raining. 

Chase away the clouds

my favorite things, my loves

colors bright and bold.

Fire

You try to hide it

but I feel the fire in you

it's burning you up.

My body is wet

Plunge your fire deep into me

Let me douse your flame.

Drink deep from my well

Lap and lick and suck at me

I will quench your thirst. 

And still I see the spark

The fire glowing in your eyes

can not be put out. 

Let it burn, Baby.

It is the best part of you

it's why I love you. 

You are so sexy

writing your smoldering words

harnessing the flame.

When you turn your back 

on the gift that burns within

you risk burning up.

Fire can be controlled

Controlled burning, used wisely

avoids disaster. 

Use your gift my love

use it gently and with thought

it will sustain you.